shaman

Baby Talk.

For me, the words "baby talk" have always meant something so different than high-pitched words from mothers and cooing and babbling from tiny babies. Baby talk reminds me of 4am... wide awake... communicating with my babies. During each pregnancy, my babies have liked to often wake me up at 4am to be with them.

Sitting here in the stillness of the amrit vela, I can't help but love it. The blurred lines between worlds makes this such a magical time. So for a while, I lay in bed, took a few deep breaths and connected with my baby and with my higher self. I feel I don't get to say "hi" to her as often as I'd like even though I know all day I am in constant contact with her (both my baby and my higher self).

I put a question out to my guides and all the light beings and ascended masters: many times this pregnancy, my daughter and I have found feathers in our path- something that is new in my experience walking on this big green and blue ball. I know shamans have feathers in their toolbox and it is a significant symbol for many different things in ancient cultures but I've never really had an experience that drew me to feathers. So I asked, "What is it about feathers that people love?"

A gentle response: "You're asking the wrong question."

I thought about that for a while. I closed my eyes again and tried to still my mind- a herculean feat, it seems, these days.

Images began to flash in my mind and then I realized the question wasn't why feathers draw people in but why they were drawing me in at the moment. I tend to always overthink about others- their actions, their reactions, what they're thinking, and why.... why? why? why? Thought patterns that were set as part of my upbringing, I think. And when I asked the question again, this time asking what it meant for me, all I saw in my mind's eye was an eagle and a condor, flying side by side, high above.

What I want more than anything now is to be like a bird. To not swoop down into the depths of valleys or feel high at mountain peaks. I just want to soar above all of it, in peace with my surroundings- whatever and whoever is there- and watch with stillness of mind and heart, wisdom, and clarity.

Thank you to the great unseen shaman who keeps putting feathers in my path. <3